NOT ME!! Monday

I would NEVER dream up a way to give our kitchen a "face lift" in order to list our house on the market that would leave me in the air conditioned house all weekend painting while my husband slaved away in the hot garage making new cabinet doors and drawer fronts!! Nope, not me!

I did not ask my husband's opinion on the new wall color for the kitchen, and while he went to another part of the store have the paint vendor mix my color preference instead of his. And I CERTAINLY wouldn't rub it in that it was my choice of color not his once he said how much he liked it!! NOT ME!



I have not ONCE rubbed in the fact that I know more about home renovation than my husband, then had to apologize and explain that it's only because I've watched more TLC, DIY and HGTV than any one person should. Nope, not me.

I am not counting down the days to when our kitchen is put back together and pretty, you know - just in time to sell the place. I mean, I've only been looking at these ugly 1985 cream laminate disaster cabinets for four years!!! NOT ME!!!

Not ME! Monday returns - or so I thought

After a small hiatus from blogging, (ok I took almost a month off, SUE ME!) Not Me! Monday has returned!! Check out the totally cute new logo!!



So I started this post as a "Not Me! Monday" post, but when I went to MckMama's page to phish off this logo, I was shocked to see little Stellan in the hospital again. He's been doing so well and their life has been so "normal" for so long that I was very surprised. Her "tweet" in the side bar quotes Dr. B saying, "He's in bad shape." I just read her blog post seconds after I wrote this and their family is coming in to the hospital. This is as bad a shape as this baby has ever been in. Please pray for this sweet little boy and his family.

Not Me! Monday

It's that time again!! To enjoy MckMama's Not Me! Monday, click the link below.



As for me, let me start by saying that I enjoy Not Me Monday whether you enjoy reading it or not! So if you're sick of it, tough.

Last Monday evening, I did not spend the evening making new friends with some ladies from church, UMW Circle 10, who coincidentally DO NOT have their monthly meetings at a restaurant away from the church in an excuse to have kid-free, husband-free, vino-enjoying dinner!! NOPE, these do NOT sound like folks I would hang out with at all, nor do they affirm why I'm a Methodist. Ahh.

On that note, I ABSOLUTELY did NOT wear a Wine Over Water t-shirt to see Steven Curtis Chapman on Faith and Family Night at Riverbend because I thought it would be hilariously ironic!! If I had done that, I wouldn't have been just a teeny bit embarrassed to run into friends from the Emmaus Community wearing said shirt.

I did not spend most of the concert sending unanswered text messages to my husband in bumble Kentucky where he could not receive them because I missed him so much.

I definitely DID NOT spend most of the time that Steven Curtis Chapman was talking about his adoption ministry Show Hope thinking about the possibility of a blended family of my own some day!! Nope, NOT ME!!

I did not spend each night Matt was away on his golf trip up past 1 am because I could not sleep. Not me!!

I did not fib about a stomach bug so that I could stay home from work and sew on Wednesday, only to find myself in the toilet minutes later with, you guessed it, an upset stomach. That Kharma's a bitch I tell ya.

If I had done that, I still would not have enjoyed staying home and sewing on Wednesday in spite of physical ailments!!! :D

On same said Wednesday, I ABSOLUTELY DID NOT send a mass email venting my frustrations about cancer (see post below) with the title Cancer Can Kiss My Ass to friends, family, and oops the pastors at church!!!! NOPE, NOT ME!!!!!!!

I was not so excited to see my husband when he got home on Thursday that I totally forgot about a phone call consultation I had arranged earlier in the week, not me!

I did not totally screw up our Saturday plans by thinking a birthday party that was actually 2-4pm was 4-6pm and we did not show up 15 minutes before it was over!! nope, not me!!

I was NOT totally mortified at the messy condition of our house on Saturday when my friend had to come over and feed and walk the dogs while we were in ATL.

I did not spend a couple of hours on the couch Sunday napping, furthur complicating my attempts to fall asleep at night. Nope, NOT ME!

Not Me Monday!!

Not Me Monday is a blog carnival hosted by MckMama where we are given the opportunity to confess the reality of our daily lives! To read MckMama's Not Me Monday post, click the link below.



I did not use the excuse of being sore from Sunday's hike to skip workouts Monday AND Tuesday. How long has it been since I went to the gym???

I did not avoid answering a phone call from my mom on Tuesday while I was at small group because I KNEW she was calling with concerning news about my friend Karson needing prayers (news I had been on pins and needles waiting on for two days). NOT ME, I always deal with reality in the moment, so it would be totally out of character for me to do that. So I DID NOT.

I certainly did not ask myself every day the rest of the week if I really had to get out of bed. Yep, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday morning I popped up happy as a lark!! And IF I had tried to avoid getting out of bed those days, it certainly would not have cause me any concern about my own mental and emotional health.

I did not spend the last hour of my work day researching and writing previous post on cloth diapering. NOT ME!! I would NEVER do that!!

After such a crappy week that didn't happen, I wasn't able to throw my cares away for a few brief hours on Friday at Riverbend while seeing The Red Headed Stranger in concert for the first time ever!!! That's right folks, I DID NOT see THE Willie Nelson in concert and he did not totally lift my spirits with those old bluegrass gospel favorites like "Will the Cirlce be Unbroken," "I'll Fly Away," and "I Saw the Light". And if I HAD seen Willie perform all of these magnificent songs, it wouldn't have prompted me to immediately search online when I got home for any gospel albums he's recorded to request as birthday gifts this year. Nope, not me!!

I did NOT wait until 11:30am to get out of bed on Saturday, and it did not take me until 4pm to get around and take the dogs to the dog park!

I did not spend Sunday evening enjoying the musical talents of The Wailers at Riverbend. Nope, I did NOT see Bob Marley's band LIVE!!!

I am certainly NOT going to miss my DH Matt while he is gone on a golfing trip with his dad. Nope, not me... sniff.

NOT ME!! Monday...

So apparently, MckMama is falling down on her Not Me Monday posts (it's been 2 weeks), but that doesn't mean that I have to! OK, I just saw on Twitter (no I'm not on Twitter, and I refuse to create an account, she just has a feed on her blog) that she is wrapping up her Not Me Monday post. Check it out here:



So, onto my confessions. It's been a couple of weeks, so we'll go way back.

I would never stoop so low as to cry and throw a hissy fit on the phone with the company that I ordered sewing supplies from for Caleb's baptism outfit (even though I knew I waited a little too long to order them) just to get them to overnight me another order. The tears and upset voice WERE real, you know, if I had done that. Which I certainly did not do.

I did not procrastinate sewing so much (even though much of it was not my fault, see above) that Caleb's mommy was worried her son would be naked, I missed a couple of kick@$$ bar-b-ques, and I was up until 2am finishing it. NOPE, I did NOT.

I wasn't just thrilled with how cute Caleb looked in his little outfit!

now for the close-up of the duds!!

Meredith and I did NOT skip our weekly walk on Wednesday due to storm clouds, and move it on inside to STARBUCKS!! How's that for a workout? We would NEVER do that!

When my friend Debbie called me for help outfitting her precious son Whit for his Elmo on the Farm birthday party, I did not shamelessly promote my friend Ashley's business and Whit did not look absolutely adorable in his custom birthday attire!

I did not throw another teary fit at the doctor's office on Friday because I was 25 minutes late for my appointment. I would not have gotten that upset that have I felt horrible for over a week, they moved my appointment out a day, then sent me to a different office I had never been to with horrible directions causing me to be late, then refused to see me. I would NEVER do that. And if I HAD done that, it certainly wouldn't have worked and I wouldn't have gotten to see the doctor anyway ;)

I did not put off cleaning my house on all those rainy days, because I'm in a bit of a funk (see previous crying fits that did not occur), and cause myself to have to stay in doors most of the day on this beautiful Saturday cleaning because I couldn't take it anymore. And if I HAD done that, I certainly wouldn't have predicted earlier in the week that it would catch up with me and I would miss out on some Vitamin D and a beautiful day. Nope, I would never do that!

I did not act like a big kid at Whit's 2nd birthday party, so much so that Debbie felt the need to send me home with a favor pail full of kids stuff and a coloring book!! :D


I did not spend most of our 6 mile hike watching our precious puppy Einstein have a ball and regretting that I never took my sweet Blaze on a hike with me just because Hurley can't go (she's got a uniquely formed foot that limits her ability for long walks/hikes) :(

Matt and Einstein enjoying the view at Edwards Point

And I certainly didn't shed a few tears while I finally said goodbye to the FIRST Man-of-my-house. I hope he's enjoyed hiking and smelling his little heart out everyday since he left (2/9/07). And I DON'T miss him every single day, I mean of course it gets easier.

It's Not ME! Monday again!!

That's right, it's NOT ME!! Monday again!! I'm starting to get the hang of this :) If you want to read past entries of NOT ME!! Monday, just click the tag at the bottom of this post.

I did not spend last week at work totally distracted and missing my sweet Joshua and his wonderful mommy Molly. And I certainly wouldn't miss them terribly and be totally bummed that Molly didn't get that job she applied for in Chattanooga a year and a half ago, all the while dreaming what it would be like to have them here. Nope, not me!!!

I also would NEVER spend the entire week planning to take off half a day Friday to go and see my mother, but wait until Thursday to turn in a leave slip. Not me, that's inconsiderate ;)

I CERTAINLY DID NOT make the biggest scene and squeal like a FREAKIN' SCHOOL GIRL in the middle of the Cincinnati Airport when my friend Hilary told me that she had decided to apply for grad school at UTC and move to Chattanooga from Indianapolis!! You know, because it has NOT been nearly 15 FREAKIN' YEARS since we've lived in the same town!!!! That's right, Hilary and I have NOT been long distance friends for half my life, when we only lived in the same town 5 years. Nope, I would never act so childish at my mother's workplace around her co-workers/ friends.

Even though I was visiting my mom for a late Mother's Day celebration, I DID NOT let HER buy ME a pedicure, because I totally did not need one. I mean, my toenails have certainly been re-painted several times since EASTER!

I did NOT have a wonderful time visiting Mom, seeing Matt's family at the CF Walk and hiding the Tobette statue this weekend! I don't love the tradition that Mom has of everyone who comes to visit her hiding Tobette.


I did not wonder while I was visiting my mom if it would be the last time I would see my little brother Toby, the yorkie. It wasn't bitter sweet for me to love on him and cuddle him Saturday before I left. I did not feel blessed to be able to see him once more, but also know that I may not see him again. Toby is not just the sweetest yorkie on the planet, and I certainly DON'T refer to a dog as my "little brother", I mean that's ridiculous.


























I did not feel the least bit guilty about being away from home while my husband was really sick for the first time in over a year. Nope, not me!

I certainly did not wait until 1 week before Caleb's Christening date to MEASURE him for his outfit, you know, because I NEVER procrastinate!!

Caleb did not spend much of after church and lunch flirting with me. And it DIDN'T KILL ME to not hold him, just in case I was carrying whatever virus Matt has. Nope, never. I mean, why would I want to hold a baby anyway? Especially a cute one like Caleb.

I did not shamelessly photograph our two dogs FINALLY laying down on the same bed because I didn't think it was so sweet. And taking time for this picture certainly didn't contribute to my tardiness for Sunday School!


And this morning, I DID NOT stay in bed a little too long snuggling with my husband because he was finally feeling better. I have not been avoiding touching or snuggling him in fear of catching whatever brought down his immune system of steel. That extra snuggle time didn't make me 1/2 hour late to work today. NOPE NOT ME!!!!

NOT ME Monday!!!

It's Not Me Monday again!!!

As a Christian, I have really been working to live what I believe. I am really trying to rid myself of my potty-mouth. I would never scream expletives at the top of my lungs while sewing my sweet godson's outfit he will wear as his mother dedicates him to the service of Christ. No, not me, that would be so un-Christian.

I would never gab to my friends at work about my husbands latest "OMG, did he really say that?" moment. And proceed to relentlessly make fun of him. NOT ME!!

I am such a health nut, you know, a dedicated pesco-vegetarian. I would never eat ice cream, frozen custard, and frozen yogurt 3 out of 4 days this weekend. Not Me!!!

I wouldn't purposefully spend a large chunk of the weekend talking about how much I LOVE Chattanooga in a shameless attempt to get Molly to move here. That doesn't sound like me AT ALL.

I didn't spend the rest of the weekend watching my husband play with our godson and think what a wonderful dad he will be some day. Nope, that sounds EVEN LESS like ME!!

I would never want to steal my precious godson and bring him home with me, nope never.

I wasn't just a little sad when my "visitor" came on Sunday just before we left for the airport, even though I know it's way too soon and the total wrong time to miss my visitor. Nope, not me.

I would never use my "visitor" as an excuse to skip a workout, or at least turn a high impact swim into a low impact walk. Nope not me!!!

My NOT ME Monday!!!

So, I am still keeping up with Stellan and the entire McKFamily after his heart surgery. It will be a long road ahead for him. But McKMama has this great tradition called Not Me! Mondays. It's a way of confessing how human you are in a sarcastic way, but I'm NEVER sarcastic. Not Me! GET IT?? To read McKMama's Not Me! Monday entries, click this button.



She says it can be liberating to live your life with this kind of honesty, so here goes.

I would NEVER wait until 30 minutes before small group to read the passages for the week, Not Me! Especially on a week I was leading discussion, no I would never do that.

I would never, EVER even THINK of waiting until 10 days before we are leaving for our godson Joshua's baby dedication in Arkansas to PULL OUT the PATTERN for his outfit. No, NOT ME!!!

I wouldn't be jealous of friends' opportunities and wallow in self pity. NEVER, Not Me!

I wouldn't neglect quiet time with my Lord, or forget to pray for people I've promised prayers for, Not Me!

I would never waste too much time on the internet when I should be doing productive things, Not Me!!

I wouldn't hit the snooze so many times that I ran out of time to shower before work. I would never wash my face, brush my teeth, freshen my deodorant, flat iron my hair, get dressed and think, "All I did was go to church and sew yesterday. How dirty could I be??" NO NOT ME!!